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Pimp My Goose

Published: 08/04/13


After opening with a sterling performance from McFly, Live Show 4 saw scandalous accusations from coaches, alarming threats from contestants, copious amounts of kissing, and talk of er, goose-pimps…

We learned Bressie doesn’t understand how the show works, Jamelia doesn’t have a problem with accents but does have difficulty getting into her chair and that Kian HAS heard of Depeche Mode he’ll have you know!

Tammy showed off her feisty side by singing about kissing girls (and liking it) And while the coaches’ reactions were mixed she certainly impressed Kathryn who grabbed her in a headlock and duly lobbed the gob.

Also in fighting form, Aoife came prepared to win at all costs brandishing a dangerous looking spikey ring and saying she was going to stab Tammy in the kidneys with it. Call the Guards!!
Katy-Anna stressed repeatedly the YEARS of experience Andrew has, you’d think the poor fella was an OAP. Though in fairness the Mann does sleep with his hat on. Andrew also tried to get votes by saying he’d show his bare naked head if he got through – nice try but not quite as tempting as the offer of Andy’s arse!

Kian called Katy-Anna a lovely girl (ah but sure aren’t they all lovely girls!) before the coaches made her cry.

After his persecution of the coaches last week Eoghan turned his attentions to Kathryn calling her modesty into question by showing pictures of her jumping on fellas and accusing her of carrying the cold sore virus.
More taxing tweets from the public accused Kian of having the bang of nerves off him and there was talk of smearing nutella all over Jamelia, saucy! Continuing the food references Kian told Dylan he was like marmite and Kathryn compared Kian to a block of cheese. Kian talked of having butterflies in his belly and contestants giving him ‘goose-pimps’ – what exactly is the man putting in his tea?

While Jamelia doesn’t buy into Shane’s posing clearly there’s many a girl that does as the lothario was suffering a bout of kissing disease this week. This revelation lead to Sharon accusing Kian of smooching all his contestants – the Dundalk Diva’s lowest blow yet!

After viewers tweeted that he looked like an electrocuted penguin, Dylan told Eoghan he likes having the craic by wearing women’s dresses and putting rollers in his hair and had the pics to prove it too! Jeez Tuam is a fierce cosmopolitan town altogether…

Jamelia went nuts at the coaches’ low scoring of Dylan, poor Kian was so scared he even got up from his chair! The Brummie Bird was also at the namedropping again, saying she toured with Destiny’s Child when she had a bun in the oven then suggesting a heavily pregnant Kelly should perform a rave next week. Kelly went one up by offering to bring on the baby and do a duet – now THAT’s how to get the votes in!

Results came and saw Aoife go through over Tammy (and she didn’t even have to use the knuckle duster), while Cork showed it prefers Elton John to AC/DC by voting for Kelly in their droves. Keith triumphed over Dylan (clearly the hair rollers didn’t impress viewers) and Katy-Anna’s going through means we’ll never get to see Andrew’s whole head. And Shane was the lucky one getting the lifeline, no doubt Kian will be rewarding him with plenty of kisses!


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